Settling In

3/30/14 23:33

Harmony left for her new home today. It feels wonderful to know I have one less to house, feed, vet, trim, vaccinate, deworm, supplement, chiropractor, turnout, clean stall, groom and exercise!

I slammed my system with caffeine this morning, got all the horses turned out before the rain hit, cleaned stalls, bathed them all, soaked and treated Dini's hoof, cleaned and organized the tack room, sleazied and blanketed everyone, got Harmony off to her new home and packed all the blankets up to go to the laundromat.

I got a bug to go show my stunning mare, Reo in halter but I'll have to bust to get her ready for the next show in 3 weeks. She's not trained, groomed or conditioned at the moment, but I think I can get her looking amazing in no time.

Reterraining

3/25/14 20:55

Harmony is officially sold, I got trailer tags and registration yesterday, bills are paid, the fruit bowl is full, but I still feel somewhat down. I'm very thankful to see all these wonderful things happen, but I feel insulated and separate. Maybe it is just my poor nutrition, which semms to chemically affect my mood, or just the natural reaction to do much change. I'm moving into a new phase of life- one that includes horses, but doesn't revolve around them. I'm not entirely sure where to go next and it's so easy to sink into old habits, but now that Harmony is sold, it's time to focus on getting the next one trained and sold.

I've Let Go

3/20/14 23:20

Harmony is sold. I thought I would be sad, disappointed, have a hard time dealing. But I'm not. I'm gloriously happy. I know I've done the best possible for Harmony, her new mom, Suzie, and I. I am thrilled that Harmony will happy and adored and I now only have horses...my lowest number since high school!

Mixed Feelings

3/18/14 22:30

Harmony is in the final stages of selling pending a vet check. Her potential new mom has been difficult to pin down, but the vet check is Thursday. She had an osteopath look at her last night and she loved her and told me I shouldn't sell her, she's a really nice horse. Which was odd, since she was there for the buyer. It was tough to hear as Harmony has the potential to take me all the way to the top in dressage competition. But I want to see her excel. It's very bittersweet.

I've interviewed for two positions that I would thrive in, both with with pretty significant pay bumps. It's tough to move up in my company. Easy to move laterally, but getting a job that really challenges and engages my mind just hasn't happened- yet! I'm hopeful that one of the positions will work out.

Sunday night I had one the best meals of my life. One of those meals that leaves your body singing and satiated.

I made new friends this weekend and socialized, I helped out my mom and her friend, the vet got everyone caught up on vaccines and Dini's teeth floated. Things are moving along wonderfully, but I feel a little depressed... not in the clinical sense, but my normal happiness has been suppressed. Thankfully, I have many tools to being my happy up, like this blog!

So lucky

3/12/14 23:06

I have such a great Mommy. I'm just so darn lucky go have someone who loves and supports me so much, unconditionally. So here's to my Mom, who I'm thankful for every single day.

All Good

3/6/13 20:44

I'm at the laundromat washing weeks of laundry, happily content knowing in another hour I will no longer be living with a huge mass of dirty clothes and bedding! Finding the time and energy to hit the laundromat has been a challenge!

I got a bunch of kudos from my team and team lead today for a Lean project that I took the initiative on and did. I asked permission to meet the first time with our awesome Lean guy, Matt, but I ran with it quietly thinking it's easier to ask forgiveness than permission. It could have gone either way since my work load increased and I didn't put the project aside because they were meeting today. Well, for the first time, I got actual acknowledgement and recognition for doing what I'm good at and enjoy doing- for the first time in a paid environment. I have an interview Monday for a great new job, but if I don't get it, I'll be happy to work on Lean in my current dept!

We had a baby shower for one of the girls with tons of yummy food and I rode Dini again this morning before work. He was so sore, he was biting at me and making faces while grooming, but still had a great attitude when going to saddle and bridle and work. That's how I know I'm on the right track- sore as all get out and STILL wants to go work! I kept it to the walk all morning because we're both a bit broken, closing my eyes and learning to trust, allow my body to relax and not to let fear intrude. It took 45 minutes, but we were boh very fluid if not entirely pain free by the end.

Riding Dini before work is such a blessing, one I never would have experienced if I didn't live at the barn.  Walking into the quiet, flicking on the lights, being greeted by welcome nickers, happy ponies and the morning sun...it grounds me and energizes me as nothing EVER has. Work was not a breeze- the entire server went down yesterday, but it doesn't even faze me, because I've already done the most important thing for me to do this day. Enjoying the pony I adore.

Good Starts

10/5/14 20:17

Today was the first day that I rode Houdini before work. I loved it. Rolling out of bed initially at 4:45 was challenge, but once I was up and moving I felt great! I was happy and energized despite ongoing challenges at work and it took all this pressure off because I did the most important thing first. All in all, we're off to a great start!!!

It also gave me the focus and strength to do yoga at lunch and eat well all day.